often times facebook make me cringe. even when i feel strongly about an issue, i never join in. not because i avoid confrontation but really because the discourse is usually pointless. either you have people who hold on to their rude/slanderous opinions and don’t budge, or you have others who try to be part of the conversation by picking on things that entirely miss the point of it. And of course, everyone else in between.

in light of that, maybe let’s consider what is wisdom. James 3:17-18 “But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere. Peace-makers who sow in peace reap a harvest of righteousness.”

oh how i desire for that wisdom to govern every word that escapes my mouth!


back in Canada

just realized today while driving that there are a**hole* here too.

short term; long term

we might be on the move again. correction: we are still in transition. the danes, it seems, have nowhere to lie their heads. our latest adventure is a possible long term move to the pearl of the orient. even that is still questionable at the moment. luke’s visa has been rejected for the 10 000th time and we are in the middle of an appeal.

recently, we are at the point of our faith where we are beginning to dig deeper. understanding certain principles and repercussions of certain actions even if they are/were not committed by us. in romans 13:1-7 – Let everyone be subject to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which God has established. The authorities that exist have been established by God. Consequently, whoever rebels against the authority is rebelling against what God has instituted, and those who do so will bring judgment on themselves. For rulers hold no terror for those who do right, but for those who do wrong. Do you want to be free from fear of the one in authority? Then do what is right and you will be commended. For the one in authority is God’s servant for your good. But if you do wrong, be afraid, for rulers do not bear the sword for no reason. They are God’s servants, agents of wrath to bring punishment on the wrongdoer. Therefore, it is necessary to submit to the authorities, not only because of possible punishment but also as a matter of conscience. now what has this got to do with us and this specific time on our lives? after getting his visa rejected multiple times in multiple countries, it’s time to stop singing the story-of-our-lives tune and to consider why this is a pattern.

so what are the possible reasons?

1. God’s will – are we deaf or blind? is there a particular door in life that we aren’t opening and that’s why we are stuck in the corridor? maybe but does God need to try so hard? we have been praying and trying to listen. i’m sure God’s voice can thunder over all distractions in my life. His ability to talk to me overrides my inability to listen (paraphrased: John Koe, 2013).

2. refusal to submit to authority – mrs danes made a decision many years ago that luke will not comply with compulsory military service. she wants to keep her boy safe so she refuses to allow him to submit to his national duty, lest he be harmed by any firearms in the process. that begun our stream of visa rejection. in verse 2, it says that by rebelling, we bring judgement onto our selves. consider this, by going against certain Godly principles (much like boundaries given to protect us), we open ourselves up to consequences/judgements. Even if this was a decision made by mrs danes, luke had to sign the papers indicating his refusal to national service and thereby forfeiting his citizenship.

now reason 1 is often used by many fellow believers for many situations. while i don’t disagree with God’s will for our lives and how that may result in failures (however that is measured by the individual in his/her context) or the feeling of going nowhere, i think reason 2 provides a better explanation for our predicament. we could just say that oh i guess God wants us to be somewhere else and just move from place to place and maybe eventually back to luke’s country of current citizenship; or we can start reading God’s word, dig a little deeper and understand the application in our lives. in this case, we are leaning towards the latter. with this new understanding, i believe we can better seek God for the breakthrough we need.

hopefully, this plays out soon and i can explore our next place of residence

Wedding and Marriage; encapsulating our relationship with Jesus Christ


it’s been a long time since i’ve written anything to say the least. many times, i’ve thought of posting something, mostly rants and then i thought better of it. or maybe i let it lapsed.

today, we sang oceans at church. i’ve been feeling like a dry land but the bridge hit me pretty hard

Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders

let me walk upon the waters, wherever you would call me

Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander

and my faith would be made stronger, in the presence of my saviour

i made this promise many years ago that i would go wherever My Father calls me. be a nomad. no problem. however, i’ve spent the last two years building a nest. after moving so much, i got scared, i flew home and started gathering branches. to keep my heart from fluttering, i probably cut off or lowered the water supply. being in the nest is so easy. i focused on the known and started the building blocks of being tied down.

no longer will i stay stagnant. time to move or get moving. go somewhere where i may even sink so i can rely on Him to float on the surface.


a loophole?

so to solve my accessing problems, marycherry suggested posterous. i’ll be posting at lorelai.posterous.com for the moment. i hope it works out.

1st of the ’09

last sunday was my first wedding of the year. well i think it’s probably the only wedding of my friends’ that i can attend considering that i won’t be able to fly in for the rest of them. it was great except my participation was affected by the nerves i felt that started 3 hours before the wedding because i had to co-host in my 3rd language. not cool. in fact at one point it got really ugly when my 2nd language was interfering with my thoughts and i got a little tongue tied. thank goodness i looked back and theHo covered for me quickly. however, i heard praises for my authentic intonation. overall, i’m satisfied with my performance. of course, the day isn’t about me.

in some ways i felt this wedding was something to look forward to. considering the artistic background of the couple, i’ve almost expected some really nice details. as they had only 3 months to prepare, they didn’t have too many details but they have the nice details. note: the theme of the wedding, i assume, is based on the current season (spring festival)

1. invitations
it was only after the wedding that i saw it but it was simple and unique. it was round, single page double sided with a design in the front that celebrated the season.

2. center pieces cimg3650
pardon my bad photo but i forgot to take it till the end of the night after my co-host duties were over. anyways, i love how the cotton flowers and baby tangerines were used. i think the colours were tied together nicely too!

3. music
there were different things achieved with the music. usually, i hear too many cheesy top 40s being played. that’s ok if it’s your theme otherwise…
so firstly, the music for the bride’s march in was absolutely whimsical. playful with a hint of naivete. i don’t know the name of the song but i’ll post it if i remember to after asking the bride. then the rest of the evening they played shanghai jazz which suited the (yes, again) the season and the food. luke is in charge of our play list; i hope ours will flow well too.

the night in general seem to have went by pretty quickly. this couple has come a long way and i’m honoured to have witnessed their journey. I’m also glad to have been asked to be part of their special day.

le dress

when i knew luke and i were headed down the aisle possibly in a year or two. i started looking at dresses. like many of my girlfriends then, i spent late friday nights watching “say YES to the dress” and after weeks of watching people buying dresses you want one too! of course, luke had no idea i was watching such a show. in fact, the show had such an impact on us girls that when a new months before luke proposed a friend got engaged and one of the first few things she said to me after being engaged was “lorelai! i can finally buy a dress!”

i always knew after reading loads of greek mythology that i wanted my wedding to have the feeling that we are all lazing around on a late afternoon eating grapes and frolicking in the water. however it completely slipped my mind that toga dresses aren’t very my style and certainly not one i want to try on the day i will be judged for my biggest fashion choice. however one can always count on vera to give you some direction and ideas. plus we can still go with a romantic and ethereal gown that will go with the theme. after looking at some options, my favourite line was vera’s fall 2006 collection. the flowy and soft fabrics and the floral embellishments are exactly what appeals to me. light and carefree; that’s the way i want to feel when making the 2nd biggest decision in my life. however a vera is too expensive and i can’t possibly spend almost half of our wedding fund on a dress!

when luke bought me my first bridal magazine after spotting a dress that would suit our theme, i fell in like with this dress from amsale. it’s lovely! i like how there are these huge flowers on the top and how the rest of the dress just flares out. i think one will look almost like a young fairy in that dress. however, i had fears that people will think i’m trying to hide a pregnancy with that dress. therefore, that design was out of the window.

at the end of the day i just thought i shouldn’t get a wedding dress in north america as it is way too expensive and i can get a bootleg when i move to the motherland. that was a thought until i remembered many people’s custom-made-prom-nightmares. so one lazy and restless sunday afternoon in july when my aunt suggested that we go dress-trying… i jumped at the chance. the first few places had nothing i wanted but we thought what the heek, let’s just try on one big poofy princess dress since everyone on reality tv seem to like the style so much. after trying it on, i finally understood why so many brides choose this generic style. if you ever feel fat and un-curvacous, the poofy princess look will make you feel like you have a pagent worthy waistline! so now i judge you less if you wear it for your wedding. anyways, we’ve been trying dresses and they been a bust so i’m feeling better about possibly custom making a dress until we stepped into the last shop. for some reason, i decided that i needed to try a mermaid cut dress. i looked through the rack and saw this dress that had some flowers attached to it and thought “ok, flowers. maybe i should try it”. uh-oh, i came out and i realized this might be it, i looked very curvacous and it’s no poofy dress! if there is one time i want to look sexy and desirable it’ll be on my wedding day. of course, there’s no way i can buy a dress on the day i’m just trying. so off home we went.

fast forward, we went shopping at another bridal district with luke in tow. that day lace was the theme. while i found my dream dress, i was most touched when i saw luke’s expression when he saw me in a gown for the first time. his jaw dropped and a second later turned into a huge smile. so the dream dress looks a little like this with a more interesting lace pattern. we didn’t buy the dress though cause it was way over budget (a vera would have been triple way over budget compared to this one).

in the end, after much or shall i say little deliberation, luke and i took the plunge and bought…

the mermaid dress!

the mermaid dress!

the flowers on the dress

the (flattened) flowers on the dress

it’s simple with no lace but i love the way it hugs my body and how it  just flows. thus ends our very short dress search.

apparently it wasn’t just a school

for most of us high school was a pretty significant part of our lives. we either developed personas and friendships that shaped our lives today or we developed personas and friendships which we shed as we found ourselves. however, i think most of us could say, no matter how (in)significant your high school life was, it was just a school. i, on the other hand, went to one of the “it” schools. such a school is one that continues to want to define your life even after you’ve long shed the personas. or worst, you find the personas creeping back as you make conversation to help people understand how you have filled those gaps inbetween without the comforts of being in the “it” school with the “it” crowd.

while i’ve shed the life i led in high school, i kept a number of significant friends who in turn kept a number of significant friends. thus weddings and birthdays often create awkward meetings with some people that you’ve long erased together with the life you no longer lead. it’s great to catch up but sometimes when you’ve gone so far ahead it’s hard to explain how many turns you’ve taken to be where you are right this moment. you see a lot of confuse looks as you try to explain because they can’t reconcile the you now and the memory they have of you then. as i waddled through many conversations, none was as appalling as one i had with the guys. one of them asked if my fiance is someone from high school. i find it incredulous that that should even be considered. if i did, it should be a surprise, not a given. firstly, i didn’t date anyone ever from high school, i moved 7000 miles after graduation, and now reside 2000 miles away. the probability of dating someone from high school is, in another words, slim. nonetheless, when i said i wasn’t, he said why not?

if he could ask such a question 6 years after graduation, can you imagine the egos i had to battle with then?

bridezilla – beyond the hormones

like many women who are engaged, i thought it was my obligation as a bride-to-be to indulge in this season’s latest chick flick – Bride Wars. i mean the vera wang, the centre pieces, the themes and the venue; nothing is more indulging than seeing what others have to deal with that i now happen to deal with on a daily basis.  of course, with a movie so cliche and stereotypical, one would not and should not expect an exciting plot and fabulous dialogue. however, one would and should expect fabulous display of wedding dresses, different themes, flowers and invitation designs. sad to say, this movie fell incredibly short of satisfying you with any wedding porn. kate hudson tried on one dress and bought that dress. there was one scene about the save the dates. 2 different looks for their 2 ceremonies. i think that’s about it.

this stingy display of what the wedding industry is capable of has earned this movie only 2 out of 5 tcbys. luke is going to be so gloaty. singing i told you so songs. humph!

HOWEVER, it has definitely made me feel that my wedding will at least look more exciting and less stuffy than the ones portraited in the movie.

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